The Golf Pro Prayer

The Pro is my Shepherd, I shall not Slice.
He maketh me to Drive Straight Down Green Fairways;
He leadeth me Safely across Still Water-Hazards;
He restoreth my Approach Shots.
He Leadeth me in the Paths of Accuracy for my Game's Sake.
Yea, though I chip through the Roughs in the shadows of Sand Traps,
I will fear no Bogies. For his Advice is with me;
His Putter and Irons, they comfort me.
He prepareth my Strategy for me in the presence of mine Opponents;
He anointeth my head with Confidence:
The Cup will not be runneth over!
Surely Birdies and Eagles shall follow me all the Rounds of my Life,
And I will score in the Low Eighties

Amen